Author Archives: Telford Vice

Slow Death: Memoirs of a Cricket Umpire

Telford Vice reviews Slow Death: Memoirs of a Cricket Umpire by Rudi Koertzen with Chris Schoeman Zebra Press, pb, 225pp, £14.99 To the South African umpire with the slowly raised finger one thing matters more than any other RUDI Koertzen … Continue reading

Posted in Magazine, May 2011, Reviews, Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , | Comments Off

Telford Vice: Australia advance, fair dinkum

So the New Zealanders came, saw and were duly conquered in the Champions Trophy final. Australia uber alles, and all that. It is, of course, churlish to deny the Australians the glory they have earned and deserve.

Posted in New Zealand, One-day cricket | 7 Comments

Telford Vice: One more time with feeling

And so to the Champions Trophy final. What a prospect. Tell me when it’s all over the bar shouting. If only the Australians weren’t quite so obviously on their way to another triumph. If only someone more threatening than New … Continue reading

Posted in New Zealand, One-day cricket | 1 Comment

Telford Vice: Pakistan! Zindabad!

Had an awful nightmare on Friday that ended with Australia earning a place in the Champions Trophy final after England made a hash of the best batting pitch of the tournament. England swashed superbly but also buckled badly and succumbed … Continue reading

Posted in One-day cricket | 2 Comments

Telford Vice: Keep smiling, skipper

It’s good to see that the sense of humour that has helped Andrew Strauss get this far in life is still with him as he contemplates England’s Champions Trophy semi-final against Australia in Centurion on Friday. “You are only as … Continue reading

Posted in One-day cricket | Comments Off

Telford Vice: Come on England!

Good thing not all of us are English, and therefore weren’t party to the misery that went with Australia’s all but unchecked charge to victory in the one-day series in England. From here – and admittedly with the help of … Continue reading

Posted in Test cricket | Comments Off

Telford Vice: The naked truth about the Indian sex dossier

It’s hard to see how the words “Gary Kirsten” might fit into the same sentence as “sex scandal”. Kirsten, once a yeoman opening batsman for South Africa, now India’s coach, has the look and the bearing of a monk, and … Continue reading

Posted in Test cricket | Comments Off

Telford Vice: Welcome back, England

As much as the previously colonised among us enjoy seeing England beaten – this utterly objective reporter included – there is much to be taken from their victories. The Three Lions were indeed rampant in their handsome win over Sri … Continue reading

Posted in Test cricket | 2 Comments

Telford Vice: R.I.P. one-day cricket?

Here lies one-day cricket, dead at 32. It is survived by an ageless parent, Test, and a rebellious adolescent sibling, T20. That, at least, is the received version of what the cricket family is staring at as we contemplate, not … Continue reading

Posted in Test cricket | 1 Comment

Telford Vice: A fond farewell to the IPL

And so the 2009 edition of the Incredible Pyrotechnic Loudness (IPL) has boomed and banged its last. Like some fabulously bejeweled courtesan, it waved its goodbye with a shimmer and a twinkle at the Wanderers on Sunday. It went not … Continue reading

Posted in IPL, South Africa | 1 Comment